Tuesday, May 19, 2009

What not to do on a first date?


Never ever do these things unless you’re not interested in the person. And if you’re not interested, why not save you both the time; grab your balls (or tits) and say so!

This applies to men and women.

DO NOT Talk about your ex. – I know. You’ve heard this one a thousand times but how many times do you find yourself caught up in a moment. Just save them for another time. You do not want to spend half of your new relationship talking about an old one. If you haven’t dropped off some of your baggage prior to this date, you don’t have enough arms left to pickup anymore.

DO NOT Tell your entire life story. – This is a first date. This person is not your psychologist and will not be turned on by hearing every little thing about you during a meal. Also, without mystery, what reason does this person have to schedule a second date, duh!

DO NOT Ask too many f-ing questions. – You are not interviewing someone for a job, you’re out to have a good and flirtatious time. Just like you do not want to divulge every little thing about you in one encounter, you definitely do not want to know every little thing about your date in one setting.

DO NOT Establish routines early. – When you ask someone out, avoid doing the same things at the same time and ordering the same meals every time you two are together. It’s cute to have a “thing”, but to do that “thing” as if there is no other thing is just plain stupid.

DO NOT Check out other people. – Unless you are horrible t verbal communication and are attempting to let your date know that you are NOT interested, there is no reason to do this. Check out people on your own time. Dedicate this time to your date. Examine him or her closely. If this is someone that you have no desire to admire this early on, why haven’t you left yet?

DO NOT Send mixed signals about the next date. – If you’re interested (or not), just say so. Don’t make determining whether or not to meet again a mystery. This is one issue that you should be very clear about.

DO NOT Jump start the conversation by starting with religion and politics. – Even jumping into social issues is a big no-no. Discuss something in between these and the weather, so that you’re not bored but you’re not livid either.

DO NOT Eat your date’s dessert. – This is an exchange often played up in films and this works every time because it takes place in a movie, not in real life, a movie.

DO NOT Say, “I’ll call you.” – This phrase is completely avoidable, never use it. If you’re not interested in your date, you should not have stayed long enough to be tempted to go there and these words should just never be uttered together when on a date. If you’re not interested, the words that should come out of your mouth should be, “I’m not interested.” Which leads me to the most important rule of dating…

DO Say what you honestly feel. – Both sexes are tired of being bs’ed. If you’re not interested, say so, and vice versa.